I am an Awkward Face-Booker...

You know those moments in life when someone says or does something that makes you feel uncomfortable, and in your mind all you can think is, "Awkward!"...Well, when those moments happen, I'm usually the last to realize it.  In fact, I'm beginning to recognize that I am an instigator of awkwardness.  You know that guy who says something, whether it be kind or condescending, and then stands there expectantly for your response but doesn't seem too sure of himself?....yeeeaaah, I'm that guy...haha.

I have the tendency to be awkward around people, but the real reason I decided to write this post is because I've realized I fit the mold of an awkward Face-booker.  Yes, I am guilty of "liking" posts that raise eyebrows. I have written more vague status comments than I can count, and I am pretty sure about 85% of them have been misconstrued in some form or fashion.  I write status updates that nobody cares to read(consistently), and I've written a gambit of unintentionally awkward messages. 

So then, why do I write this post? 

Because admitting you have a problem is the first step right?...haha, just kidding.  No, the reason I wrote this post is because I think people make too big of a deal out of little things like facebook comments.  For instance, I know I don't sit and analyze the deeper meaning behind what people comment on my status, because they're freaking facebook comments...I mean, seriously, have we sunk to the point where commenting on someone's Facebook status is considered meaningful conversation?  I sure hope not!  I think a lot of good things can be said on Facebook, but they'll never have the impact or power that spoken words have.  Heck, even a text message is more personal than commenting on somebody's status.  I guess if "awkward" within the realm of Facebook is defined as someone who says what they're thinking without putting a people-pleasing spin on it, then I'm awkward. I don't care enough to re-read everything I say on Facebook.  I just say what I'm thinking and try to stay away from topics I don't know much about. If I tell you "I'm praying for you," or "I hope you have a great day,"  I really mean those things. 

I am an awkward Face-booker, and I'm okay with that fact. 
-Matt

Why Do I Play Golf?

For those of you who haven't heard, I moved into a new apartment this past weekend.  The new place is great, my roommate is a cool guy, and I feel that I am going to really enjoy living there. A couple of  perks it has to offer are a nice community, a good gym, and a golf course.  But the last item has been my favorite thing by far, and I have used the course almost every day since I moved.

 Throughout the past seven or eight years of my life I have become partially obsessed with the game of golf, and for a casual player, I think I'm pretty good.  I'm not anywhere near as good as even the worst professionals, and I don't ever expect to be, but I consistently break 90 and flirt with the 70's from time-to-time.  I was playing on Sunday afternoon (not as well as I'd have liked) and I started thinking to myself, "Why do I play this game, and how in the world did I get started?"  I realized then that my love for the game of golf began when I was 8 years old.

I remember the first day I watched golf...and it just so happened to be one of the most memorable days in golf history.  It was the Spring of 2007, a Saturday afternoon, and I was at my best friend's house playing a game we invented called "knee hockey".  On every television in the house, there was a golf tournament going on, and as much as I tried not to care, it's really hard to not watch when your best friend's dad keeps yelling, "Damn! this kid is good!"  So, we watched a hole to see what was going on. . .

"The kid," was Tiger Woods, and the tournament was the 1997 Masters.  Tiger had just driven the ball down the middle of the 2nd fairway and we picked up the action as he hit an incredible shot onto the green to set up an easy birdie.  From that moment on,  I couldn't stop watching.  I was hooked.  Tiger went on to win the Masters that year, and beat everyone else by 12 strokes (A Masters Record).  I continued to watch every tournament I could that involved Tiger Woods. For some reason, even today, the PGA Tour just doesn't seem interesting to me when Tiger isn't playing.  I think this article by Bill Simmons of ESPN describes my Tiger Woods fan condition pretty well.

http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/110411

I'm not going to get into arguing about Tiger's character off the golf course...I'm just not.

Tiger jump-started my proverbial golf battery, but I didn't actually get a chance to play the game until I moved to Arkansas.  I cited in a post, a few weeks back, an argument I had with my best friend, Jim, about who the greatest golfer ever was.  Little did I know that Jim would eventually be the outlet to plug me into the game of golf.  A few months after I moved to Arkansas, in 2002, Jim got me to join the First Tee Golf Club in Little Rock.  It is a great course, and I got to take free lessons. So, since I was homeschooled, I ended up going to as many classes as I possibly could.  As my game progressed - very slowly at times - I began to realize why I enjoyed this sport as much as, or even more than the other sports I played. 

Golf is a constant battle against an opponent, there are no time-outs, there are no halftimes, and everything that goes through your mind either works for or against you.  The battle has nothing to do with the course because the battle is fought completely against yourself.  Sure, it takes skill and a lot of practice to understand how to manage a course and make good shots.  However, good shots don't happen unless you're completely focused on making good shots.  My favorite part of playing golf is knowing that no matter how much I play, I'll never manage to be perfect. I wont always hit good shots, in fact, I hit a lot of bad shots, but I keep playing.  I keep playing because being humbled by a bad shot provides me with the opportunity to remain joyful in spite of my circumstance. In that moment, all I can try to do is attempt to recover by forgetting the bad shot and focusing on how good the next one is going to be.  Being joyful is  something I am not good at.  I generally don't get very excited about things.  Golf helps me stay focused on being positive. It's the only sport I've ever played that I don't feel pressured to be really good at, and it has become a source of relief instead of a source of stress for me.  It's my time to get outside to experience and enjoy God's creation, it trains me to have a better attitude, and it's insanely challenging (I love a good challenge).  These are the reasons why I play golf...

-Matt

A Few Thoughts on an Interview with Rob Bell

Rob Bell, a very popular pastor/book-writer/theologian, recently published a book entitled, Love Wins: A book about Heaven, Hell, and the fate of every person.  I have not read this book. However, I intend too...If anyone has a copy, may I borrow it so I don't have to spend the money?

I have no shame in going on the record and saying I believe Rob Bell takes away from the gospel by watering it down and presenting it in a pluralistic fashion.  In a recent interview, Rob Bell got asked some questions that I feel a "theologian", especially one who is responsible for as many people as he is, should be able to answer fairly easily (or at least attempt to answer).  But he struggled to find a good answer, and avoided the questions throughout.  Let me know what you think:

I'd really appreciate some feedback on this one.  Honestly, I blatantly disagree with what I've heard him say,  but I'd like to hear from others who either agree or disagree as well. Specifically on the question, "Is God all-powerful, but does not care for His people, or is it that He cares, but is not all-powerful?"  I'll tell you right now that I think the answer is, "Neither."

Thanks,
-Matt

Summation of a Week

Hey guys, sorry I haven't posted in awhile, life has kept me very busy.  This has been a very good couple of weeks for me.  I've been learning a lot about myself and my relationship with God, and I've been learning so much more about His nature and character.  I found out this past week that I am in fact the valedictorian of my college class.  Also, I think I may finally be getting an apartment soon. 

As we go through life we are constantly changing and being molded.  Sometimes we don't even recognize that changes are taking place.  Lately, I have been examining myself and I realized I allowed some circumstances in my life to change who I am.  Like a soft ball of clay, I placed myself into the hands of my surroundings, and I submitted to the will of my wicked and bitter heart.  I came to the conclusion that by letting my past define who I am, I'm just denying myself the possibility of the future God has for me.  So, from now on, I'm living in the present with an optimistic outlook on the future.

So, I found out this week that I am officially the Valedictorian of my college class. This didn't come as a great surprise to me because I worked in the academics office at the school and knew my GPA was the highest in my class.  However, while I am proud of this achievement, I feel the need to say I feel a little bit dirty for being Valedictorian with a GPA less than 3.9 (or 4.0 for that matter).  I worked very hard my last two years of school, and during that time I think I was the kind of student a Valedictorian should be.  However, during my freshman and sophomore years of school, I was lazy.  I still made good grades, but I didn't apply myself at all. I wish now that I had put forth some effort and used the mind God has given me, but as I said above, I'm not dwelling on the past.  I am honored to be Ecclesia College's  2011 Valedictorian, and I am thankful for all of my classmates who will be graduating alongside me. I cannot thank my professors enough for instilling in me the desire to be a life-long learner, and for challenging me above and beyond the normal expectations of the classroom.

The last thing I wanted to say is that I think I may be moving soon...finally.  I'm praying that it'll happen and trusting God with the result.

-Matt

Happy Monday!

There's not really much of a point to this post except to say I hope all of you have a wonderful Monday.  I urge you all to consider what God would have you do today before jumping into your routine.  Get in the Word, let the joy of the Lord be your strength, and let's make a difference today by having a countenance that is warm and welcoming.  Be the reflection of Christ wherever you are...

Love you guys!

-Matt

Community

Something that has been weighing heavy on my heart lately is the concept of community.  No, not that wonderful television show about Community College Study Groups.  I'm talking about real fellowship with believers of Christ. How often do you spend time with your Christian brothers & sisters worshiping, praying, or discussing God's word?  How often do we set aside our hang out time to get serious and talk about what God is doing in our lives?  When nonbelievers look at us, what are they seeing?

Last Sunday, I went to church at The Grove Church in Fayetteville, Arkansas.  If you are currently without a church, and you're looking for a place full of believers who are sold out for God.  The Grove is for you.  After a really good set of worship, the pastor got up and started teaching.  He had been teaching out of Nehemiah and finished Chapter Six the week before.  At the end of Chapter Six, Nehemiah and his people finished building their wall.  The massive project was completed in 52 days, and the people were relieved to have it finished.  It is absolutely incredible how God used Nehemiah to unite a group of people to complete such an enormous task, but I think the more important part is what happened next.

In Chapter seven, we read that Nehemiah gathered all of the people together and brought them inside the city walls. The beginning of chapter eight says that Nehemiah had Ezra read the law to the people who gathered together every morning from sun-up to midday to listen.  When he began reading, the people were overwhelmed and began to worship the Lord together because it had been so long since they had heard God's word spoken to them.  Nehemiah understood the importance of the people's spiritual needs, and placed them above other daily activities.  This passage of scripture is a great example of how people are greater than projects, and is a great reminder of how important it is for us to be in community with fellow believers so that we can experience the joy of others as they receive great and new revelations from God.  In this case, just the simplicity of reading God's words to His people was enough to reduce the crowds to tears of joy as they worshiped God together.

In the end, Nehemiah says, "Do not mourn or weep - for all the people were weeping when they heard the words of the law - Go eat of the fat, drink of the sweet, and send portions to him who has nothing prepared" (Neh. 8:9-10).  They threw a party! Spirituality and studying the word don't have to only be somber and serious things; in fact, quite the opposite.  Nehemiah knew this and exhibited a wonderful model of how we can have seriousness in a time of celebration.  We should be celebrating with each other over the great things God is doing in our lives.  However, in order to have celebration, we need to have community & fellowship with each other first.

Something to think about:

When you go to church, are you just alone in a large group? Your immediate answer will most likely be no, but are you really being honest with yourself?  Even if you ride to church with someone else, or sit with a group of your best friends, are you there by yourself? Do you feel like you're connected?  Or are you trying to walk out your spiritual life on your own?  The fact of the matter is we cannot do this on our own.  We need to have people in our lives. . .We need community.  We need to get serious about our faith and about God's word, and we need to start sharing our lives with one another so we can, in turn, share our lives with the world.  The world is in need of hope, life, light, peace, and joy.  We can be those things to the world, but we need to be united with each other first.

-Matt

Future Direction?

Tonight is just one of those nights where I feel the need to write just so that I can see my thoughts in a tangible form.  I've been struggling here lately to  really be honest with myself about where I see myself in five years, and not knowing really frustrates me.  My biggest pet peeve (<---hate that cliche) is not knowing how things are going to turn out.  I still enjoy a good suspense film, and I love books that keep me guessing, but when it comes to real life; I always have this feeling that I need to know what is going to happen. 

Obviously, I am not capable of predicting the future.  If I was, I'd be a billionaire, and I would not be writing a blog. So, I run into the obvious problem of worrying way too much about the outcome of unpredictable events.  Also, I have a nearly impossible time making important life decisions.  For example:

I graduated college in December and I have a great job that I really enjoy. It has a lot of potential to just keep getting better if I keep working hard, and I am super blessed to be in the position that I am in currently.  On the flip side, I've always dreamed of going to graduate school to get a masters degree.  I want to be able to work and go to school at the same time, but I know myself, and I know that in order for me to do well at both I'd have to basically kill myself and give up anything I have that resembles a social life.  Essentially, the steps I would take to be an excellent student and a great representative for my boss would make me lousy at both.

So, the situation is as such...Do I commit to working in the insurance industry for the next 5, 10, 15 years and possibly do very well in a lucrative career? Or, do I apply for graduate school and see where it takes me?  Can I do both even though I don't have the confidence in myself?  Also, what's God's plan for me in all of this, and how will I know?

I'm not going to lie, I'm pretty confused about all of this right now, and it's really stressing me out...

-Matt